Back With Preliminary Results

We started off early this morning since my doctor is so far away. We packed up the van and headed out. I gave Gabriella an 8 ounce bottle which I never ever do. Because of her reflux I usually give her a 4 to 5 oz with a meal. Since we were in a rush I threw some fruit loops in a baggie and let her have the bottle. She was fine for an hour then the fussing began. She seemed in a little pain. I found some Mycelin drops in my diaper bag and it seemed to do the trick. Still she started to kind of fuss a bit so that made me nervous about how this day would go. She ended up being just a little cranky today but with the drops she was much better...then slept the whole way home. So it wasn't too bad. Now she is running around the living room smiling and trying to talk to her reflection on the back of my laptop. Seriously.

OK. On to the topic at hand. I got to the Surgery Center and because Jason couldn't be in there with me he took the kids to McDonald's for a snack. I checked in and headed to the lower level. I was taken immediately in for my ECHO. I had to lie on my left side, which was interesting. She scanned through my back and then while still on my side just under the left breast but that was it. It was over pretty fast. I was just glad they didn't play the heart beat out loud this time. I hated hearing it before. I could tell it sounded "squishy". I didn't really WANT to lie there worrying about it so I am glad I couldn't hear it.

Then I dressed and went back to the waiting room. I waited maybe 10 to 15 minutes then went back for the CT. This is where it gets fun. I answered some questions then she told me I would need to be injected with a contrast dye that could cause a warming sensation in my throat and it would move down my body eventually in my bladder and could give me the sensation I peed my pants. GREAT. I literally said that too. That's just wonderful. I changed into the gown and laid down. Then she looked at my veins and said she would need a smaller needle. Then she warned me of the stick, said my vein was rolling away, she wiggled the needle a bunch then said she blew the vein. (Still not positive what that means. It sounds so bad) So she says she'll try the other arm. She tried for 5 minutes on the first. (OUCH) I am pretty good with needles but IV's are more painful to me then a shot. I still do pretty good until you start wiggling the needle around. She stuck my other arm, said she thought she got it, but didn't. The vein moved again and she then after much wiggling said that one blew too. YEAH!!! haha So she used the side of my hand just down from my thumb. This one easily hurt the most and she wiggled it a whole lot. Finally after just pleading with God that she'd get it she did. The warming sensation did happen but did not make me feel like I peed. I think it could have if I didn't have an advance warning of what it would feel like. The nurse was very very nice and I do believe I sometimes have disobedient veins.

After the scan it was just about 1 p.m. We had an hour to kill before I saw the oncologist so Jason (hubby) took me to get some food. I ate and then went back and had my blood drawn!!! More needles. That's four in one hour. She did it just under the stick the first nurse did in my left arm and guess what? She used a normal sized needle and had no trouble. Then again she does that all day everyday. She is an oncology nurse. It involves a whole lot of needles. I finally saw the doc. He was late because of a meeting. He said my blood tests were GREAT. Then he asked about symptoms and different things then said they had the preliminary results of the CT scan and they looked great. He said they won't have the official results for a few days but said he didn't see anything in there!!! How good is that to hear. And guess what? He told me this in the same room he told me I had cancer in. It was in the same room, same seat.

Wow. I don't have the results of the ECHO yet but things look good. I am just about ready to believe I beat this thing for good. My oncologist looked at me and told me bluntly "You're gonna be fine." So that felt good.

I cannot explain to you how very hard it is to believe that cancer is gone...that it won't come back. It's almost scary to let go and just believe it but I am thinking maybe it's OK. Maybe I can just believe it now! I am waiting for the final results and I of course will update when I get them. I took the pics here of the actual CT machine I was in. I was alone for a bit so I just decided to snap a couple. Thanks for all the thoughts, prayers and well wishes. I appreciate every kind word and prayer so much!!