Wednesday, January 14, 2009

The Anxiety Has Officially Set In!

Well I realized something today. I am doing it again. It is now January 14th. My appointment is January 22nd. I am now starting to feel every symptom in the book, or at least questioning whether or not I am. I guess the nightmares will probably start again too. I do this every single time yet I don't think about it at first. I realize I am doing it after I have worried myself to death. I always get anxious before my follow ups. The week prior is always the worst. I can tell it gets to my hubby too. I can see it in his eyes. He sort of admitted it to me last night when I flat out asked him if he was getting the jitters yet. He looked at me in such a guilty way that I laughed. Yeah I need prayers, thoughts and words of support right about now! I had a nightmare a couple of appointments ago that the doc came in, took my hubby to another room and told HIM my cancer came back. That one was odd. I haven't had any bad dreams yet. I was warned before I ever finished treatment for my cancer that this would happen. I do take some comfort in that!!

7 comments:

  1. I was diagnosed with cancer when I was 22 months old, so I don't remember life when I wasn't a cancer survivor, but I do remember what a relief it was to have my five-year checkup and to get that "you made it five years" all-clear. You will definitely be in my thoughts and prayers!

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  2. wow MaryAnne! So young. That is scary. Congrats on being a survivor as well. I cannot wait for my 5th year!!

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  3. You are an inspiration...try to stay in the moment...right now all is good and you have your beautiful baby girl. You're in my prayers and thoughts.

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  4. Nothing like positive thinking and a good relax. Hope it all goes well.
    xx

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  5. You shall remain in my thoughts and prayers Sandi. Big hug. :)

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  6. Hello Sandi, I love your blog and I follow now.

    Satya Wardhana
    http://problemsolvingsurgerycases.blogspot.com/

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